A little of this a little of that

So it's been a couple months (three actually) since I wrote.  I have thought about writing many times, but life kind of just catches up with me and I never do.  Since my last post we have celebrated Easter, gone through some ups & downs of house decisions, had our 5th wedding anniversary and had a good time at Sexsmith's Chataqua Day.  Ah life.

It doesn't seem like life should be going by quite this fast.  5 years ago we got married.  5 years ago.  Yet a whole lot of life has happened in those 5 years.  3 babies, 2 miscarriages, selling one house and completely renovating another, changing vehicles, getting a camping trailer, and a lot of family changes in the middle.  5 years shouldn't bring about that much change right?  It makes me very excited to see what the next 5 years will bring.

For now though, here are some pictures of recent life!

3 years ago

3 years ago my life was altered in a way I never wanted it to be.  3 years ago I experienced my first loss of a child.  I never knew my child in the way that most parents do because he/she (referred to as he from now on) was only 8 weeks gestation, but he was still a part of me.  He was a surprise, but he was loved and wanted from the second we discovered he was on his way.  I don't know if I will ever forget the feelings I had when I first started bleeding the few days before I lost that baby.  That week was a very long week, full of emotions and waiting, fear and uncertainty.  And even though I have had two full-term pregnancies since then, with each one that fear and uncertainty comes back.  With each pregnancy I now ask myself "will this one stick?"  3 years ago my life changed.  Happy birthday my darling child.  My Timothy Neveah. 

Randomness about my thoughts this week

My mind has been running these last few weeks.  Unlike most ladies, I don't find the post partum period to be too bad.  I haven't really had a huge issue adjusting with any of my babies thus far, but I find that I do a lot of deep thinking during the first few weeks after I have a baby.  I don't share a lot, and I don't even talk a lot with my babies or Dan, but my mind works through a lot.  And it's not even that I discover anything deep or challenging about myself or the world, it's just thoughts about life.

So in light of that, this post may be a bit random.  Kendall is 6 weeks tomorrow (and seriously, where does the time go?) and we are settling into a routine.  All of that got thrown out the window this week as Brooklyn came down with some sort of nasty virus, which hopefully doesn't make it's rounds now, but she is on the upswing and life will probably get back to normal next week.  As normal as it gets with a newborn around anyway.  And maybe it's been because we had to take a step back this past week that I am feeling somewhat thoughtful. 

Just a hint of a smile

I was the beneficiary of plenty of cuddles with all my girls this week, but especially with Brooklyn.  And there is just something about having the chubby hands of your sick two year old wrapped around your neck or her small warm body cuddled up beside you as she naps that makes you want the moment to never end.  The pleasure of having your newborn cuddle up into your chest while your toddler and preschooler each cuddle up on either side of you while you watch "The Little Mermaid" or "Tangled" for the 1000th time that makes time seem like it needs to stand still.  So many moments where you think it would be great to have a camera, but then again, a camera can never truly capture the full feeling of the moment.  It doesn't save the smells and sounds and feelings.  So I just let my mind capture it all, and I savoured in every moment. 


Pretty in pink

And that makes it sound like this week was without challenge, but that's not true.  There were definite times of challenge and times where I wondered if I would make it through the day with my sanity still around.  I did, kind of, and somehow I made it through the sleep deprived nights we had this week.  Nothing like sharing your bed with a two year old and newborn.  That doesn't make for much sleep for mom! 


My drama queen

But here we are, at the end of the week.  And it's just after 9 pm on Saturday night.  Dan is on call and out working right now, so I'm home alone with the girls.  Sitting in silence because all 3 are asleep, in their own beds!  I survived another week and can look ahead to the new challenges that next week will bring.  But for now, I'll just sit here and enjoy the silence, because I really have no idea how long it will last.

Kendall Susanne

I know this is late but I'd like to announce the arrival of our third daughter - Kendall Susanne.  She was born January 19, 2014 at 11:17 pm weighing in a 8 lbs, 8 oz and 19 3/4 inches long.  She has been a wonderful addition to our family and we are thoroughly enjoying getting to know her!

Life in the New Year

Well 2014 has begun.  It's been a bit of a slow start for us here at the Viels.  It seems like time has stopped moving and we are at a standstill.  That isn't the actual case obviously because time doesn't really ever stop.  However I am in the final weeks of pregnancy and time seems to have stopped.  It is only the 5th (and yes, I had to check the calendar to make sure that was right) and it feels like it should be the 20th.  Yup, this month is dragging by.

In other news, my other baby turns 2 on Saturday.  2 already.  2 years ago I was in a similar position, only I was legitimately that much closer to the end.  2 years of living with our adorably cute Brooklyn, who decided that the stage was a good place to be in church this morning.  While the pastor was preaching.  I guess it's a good thing that our girls are feeling comfortable at the church we have been going to!

Merry Christmas!

So as I was laying in bed at 3:30, as awake as ever, I realized why I love Christmas so much and it wasn't about the presents or any of that stuff.  However now, at 10 in the morning on Christmas Eve, I can't really remember what my early morning thoughts were.  I'm sure my morning thoughts had something to do with my kids and seeing them learn to love the season.  I also remember thinking that this new information was kind of revolutionary for me.  Apparently it wasn't all that revolutionary.  At any rate, I'm still excited for today and tomorrow, so Merry Christmas to all and as you celebrate may you remember the birth of Jesus and the sacrifice that He made in coming as a baby.  The sacrifice He made in exchanging His place in heaven for humanity and His eventual death.

30 Weeks

This post is probably not going to be very pregnancy related at all actually.  I am 30 weeks along (only a long 10 more to go) but the past couple weeks have been quite rough.  It's hard to say whether they have been rough because of pregnancy or because God is trying to teach me something.  Probably a combination of both.  It just seems like I am constantly at the end of my rope these days. 

There have been a few changes in life over the past month and that's probably the reason why I've been challenged so much these past couple of weeks.  For starters, we are church hunting.  Due to various reasons that don't need to be dragged up here, we have decided to look around at other churches in our area.  It's not an easy thing to do.  We are tearing our kids out from the church that they have known and throwing them into a new experience.  It's not a bad thing, but it is hard to see them miss their friends and Sunday morning routine.  We are tearing ourselves out from the church where we got married and dedicated our two kids.  My family is there.  It's not easy.  But God doesn't ask you to do the easy thing all the time.  In fact, most times He asks you to do something, it's not going to be the easy way out.

The next change has been Bible study.  And this isn't really a change, but more so of a challenge.  The first study we did this year was "What Happens When Women Say Yes to God".  And it kind of kicked my butt.  I don't like change and I don't like being stretched.  Saying yes to God usually means one or both (most often both) of those things.  Maybe this one should have come first because it happened first chronologically, but oh well.  Going through the study challenged me and then came our decision regarding church.  And I had to put what I had learned into practice.  And I'll repeat, it isn't easy.

The next thing that's been pretty huge on my heart recently is our adoption.  We are in a holding phase right now just waiting for God to give us the go ahead to apply.  Haiti has finished it's adoption reorganization and we now fit much better their requirements for international adoption.  That said, it still won't be a quick and easy process.  But God has been working in both Dan & I as we talk about finances and what we are going to do in regards to this.  In God's time and as we wait, I'll use the time to prepare.  I can't say I'm not excited for this adventure though!

And yes, my pregnancy has been not easy either.  This one has been the hardest thus far.  I haven't felt great most days.  I haven't had a whole lot of energy and I am just ready to be done.  It's a good thing Christmas is here because that will give me a distraction for the next 6 weeks.  And then I've only got a few left - in which I can busy myself with Brooklyn's birthday, Maddison's birthday & getting ready for baby.  Our January/February is about to be crazy crazy crazy with 3 birthdays and Christmas/New Year's in 1 1/2 months.